Regular Occurances

 To fully comprehend the idea of "coolness" has taken me forever. I never really understood what the "in" crowd was all about, but I did get the urge to fit into it. I thought maybe it was about clothes, or music, or the way someone looked, or where people had been, maybe it was about money, or art or the ability to say what you were thinking without fubbing up the words. I was lost in the disillusion of the thought. And to be completely honest, I still don't have a fricking clue. 
 I have this compulsive need to reverberate any thought that graces my mind, an excitable energy that blows up any time something sparks my interests and this overwhelming motivation to discover. Self discovery seems to be the most significant of tasks. I have this unshakable belief that if I discover who I am, then I might have an idea of how the rest of humanity works. I figure, since I am human and there are a lot of humans out there....... there has to be a common link that we all can relate too somewhere or somehow. I feel like if I entrust myself into a variety of situations and atmospheres then I will have a template that will allow a broad understanding of what we are involved in. Needless to say, I have allowed myself to be the guinea pig of this project.
 The strange thing is that life is the guinea pig. I get the sense that we are all trying to understand on some level or another who we are, where we fit, why we feel this way, why we don't feel that way, what our purpose is and how the hell do we know if we are on the right path or not.... all the while enjoying the process. I mean seriously, we are living in a world where trees convert CO2 into oxygen, where there is enough gravity that enables us to walk about, where birds coast along the jet streams of the sky and where we can sit on a computer translating our thoughts into letters and posting them for the rest of the world to read..... and even if you are unable to understand the language that is being written there is a translator that will allow you to convert the message into one that is comprehensible to the reader. That shit is messed up.. and it is considered absolutely normal. 
 The way I look at it normalcy is a beautiful thing; and when I really think about it, whatever is "normally" going on is a complete miracle. It does not seem to matter much if we are classified as being: sexy, rich, poor, weird, awkward, wanderers, mathematicians, scientists or seekers; we are all exploring the same existence....just in a variety of colours. In reality, each and every single one of us started off in a ball sack and grew in a belly. If that's not cool I have no idea what is.