Control. I guess that is all it is - the need or reassurance to feel like we have some control over our own destiny. Ultimately, we always have choices, however small or huge they may seem, we have the final choice on how we are going to act or behave. The problem is as much as we may want control, taking responsibility for the outcome of a choice can be extremely difficult to accept.
Not only, do we have to deal with the consequences of our actions, but we have to deal with the consequences of our feelings related to the decisions that we have made and the effect it has had on the world around us.
No matter how small our world is - we have an impact. A tone, a look, a missed observation, being late, being early, not laughing quick enough, being too intense, not looking interested enough from what we eat, what we talk about, to how we interact with our community - we impact what is around us.
The thoughts we fuel our mind with become the images we see and the confirmation we seek. There are times when I don't understand the value or importance we put into some issues while completely negating others - and then it makes sense.
It is about choice, making a decision and awakening to the reality of integrity. When we start to realize that our words become our power, our words become our truth and our focus becomes our path, we have created an internal obligation.
We can escape all we like, breaking away from the worlds we have created, turning away from the world that has been brought to us, and even attempting to deny the existence of options; however, we will always end up in our own head. At that point we have nowhere to go and our decision is our own - we will come to realize that either way we have made a choice, like it or not, accept it if you will but a decision has been made.
The goal is to live with your judgement - you never know what gold is laying behind your thoughts and is actually achievable. All we need to remember is if we have the opportunity of making a decision truly materialize, we are the lucky ones.
